I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Randomize
