are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Randomize
