It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
