im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Your penis caused this!
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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