Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
We don't watch enough power rangers
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
