This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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