We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Randomize
