She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
I am mentally ready for anal.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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