Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize