He kissed a someone with a penis
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
