it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize