i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
