Don't make out with my wife yet
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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