If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
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