I'm gonna have a badass scar
im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
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