I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Randomize
