Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
Randomize
