We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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