I wanna passion pit in your ass
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
ugly people sure do ruin things
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
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