remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
