I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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