Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
