I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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