Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
