Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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