He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
worst night to have a conscience
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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