so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
3pm strippers are depressing
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
