She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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