why didn't you poke me back
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
