This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
