I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
