I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
