I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Randomize
