she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
