I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Randomize
