I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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