So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Is it because I queefed?
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
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