so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize