winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
