It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
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