OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
