How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Randomize