Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
