I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
His hands were made for my vagina.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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