names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize