I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
That was before I lit my hair on fire
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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