If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Randomize
