im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
