Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
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