I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize